Roller derby bout this weekend

This Saturday we take on our friends, the Long Island Roller Rebels!  Going to the bout?  Say so on facebook: https://www.facebook.com/events/330452623705757/

Tickets are $10 in advance (I have tickets - hit me up!) and $12 at the door.  Or you can try to win tickets from our sponsor Nipper Town: http://www.nippertown.com/2012/07/17/win-free-tix-to-see-the-hellions-roller-derby-gals-on-saturday/

Recap: Hellions vs. Suburbia Roller Derby

Shockratease wrote an awesome recap of this bout over on the Times Union derby blog so make sure you check it out: http://blog.timesunion.com/rollerderby/hellions-of-troy-take-on-suburban-brawl/5793/

Also check out Suburbia's bout recap: http://suburbiarollerderby.com/news

Long story short, we played Suburbia on February 25 and lost 250-75, but we gained a lot of insight on what we need to work on as we head into our 2012 season. Suburbia Roller Derby is ranked #12 in the WFTDA East Region.

Despite losing, overall we had a really great time down in Yonkers on Saturday.  First of all, check out this awesome welcome basket!

They wrote us a nice welcome note in that tiger card. I put one of the cupcake stickers on my helmet.

We got to the bout a little early, so we hung out in the locker room area and changed our wheels.  Val temp-sewed Trixie's number to a jersey.

Short Temper, Lehman Smothers, and Valerie Valkyrie doing some pre-bout maintenance.

Another awesome thing about the event was that Yonkers is pretty close to a few other leagues, so we had friends come out and cheer for awesome derby that night.  It seemed like half of the Long Island Roller Rebels were sitting behind our bench the first period. I also saw people from Gotham, the Shock Exchange, Hudson Valley, and New Jersey. It was a great crowd - I think the event even sold out.

Thanks for the cheers!
LIRR and Bane-ana watching the derby action.
Photo by Manish Gosalia

Thank you Suburbia for the awesome time this past weekend!

Photo by Manish Gosalia

WFTDA Apprentice League!!!

We did it! We were accepted to the Women's Flat Track Derby Associate as an apprentice league! This has been our goal since our inception an my personal focus for the past year as the application coordinator. I did tons of research, met a lot of people, did a lot of traveling, and worked hard with my amazing team to show the derby world that the Hellions kick ass. And with the proper guidance, we'll be even more amazing.

On Thursday, October 27, 2011, the WTFDA announced this quarter's group of accepted leagues:
http://wftda.com/news/apprentice-leagues-october-2011

From the WFTDA website, the Apprenctice Program is

Designed to act as a WFTDA 101 tutorial, the Apprentice Program matches new leagues with an established WFTDA mentor, who guides her apprentice through WFTDA processes and requirements, and offers advice about league-specific issues. The curriculum can include everything from league formation to how to become ranked and qualify for WFTDA-sponsored tournaments. Upon completion of the program, apprentice leagues will have the knowledge and league recommendations to apply for full WFTDA membership.

A long road led us to where we are today. I want to say thank you to the following who helped and inspired us along the way:

The Long Island Roller Rebels - you've always inspired us. Thank you for visiting us for a fun practice night. Thank you for the scrimmage opportunities. And thank you for hosting the Empire Skate Showdown, which gave us a chance to shine this year.





Central New York Roller Derby - the team we admire, and strive to be like. We learned so much from you this year and love working with you. We saw how much you grew as a league since being accepted as a full WFTDA member last year. We want to follow in your footsteps!

Our officials - We would not be the well-rounded league we are without The "Argue-nots", our refereeing and non-skating officials staff. Many of them are on the path to become Certified WFTDA referees. Our acceptance into the WFTDA Apprentice Program will help them with this cause because we'll be bouting more WFTDA leagues ourselves (for them to officiate!)  It's a great relationship.  Our officials are also amazing representatives of the Hellions, as they travel pretty much more than anyone to attend and volunteer at away bouts - seemingly every weekend.  We love you Team Zebra!  Thank you for spreading the good name and good nature of the Hellions!

Our announcers - Ida Feltersnatch and Eloda Sarcasm.  These two women are the reason I have such an awesome appreciate for WFTDA in the first place.  They brought me on my first derby road trip to the 2009 Championships, a derby experience I'll never forget and one that shaped my attitude about being part of the larger derby community.  Ida and Eloda call in to the Derby Deeds early and often to keep people on top of our adventures - of which we have so many.  And like Team Zebra, Ida and Eloda are constant travelers, always spreading the good word of the Hellions.  Oh, and by the way - they BOTH became AFTDA Certified this year.  Like the all the Hellions and the refs, they want to be part of their great organizations in the field of roller derby.

Thank you to all the WFTDA Leagues we bouted in 2011 - Queen City, Green Mountain, Providence, Garden State, Montreal, Connecticut, Roc City, Maine, Hudson Valley and of course our match up against Gotham's Wall Street Traitors at Empire Skate Showdown.  We learned something new every game - either from on the track or off the track at the after party. ;)

And of course, thank you from ME to all my amazing league. Team work makes the dream work. We did it!

The Hellions after our bout in Montreal this past summer.  Look at that strategically placed WFTDA banner.
It was meant to be!

I thought 2011 was the year of the Hellions - but the best is yet to come!

Empire Skate Showdown recap - part 1

Photo by Hazmatt

The Hellions of Troy Roller Derby League earned a top three finish at the 2nd Annual New York State all-female flat track roller derby tournament "Empire Skate Showdown", hosted by the Long Island Roller Rebels in Old Bethpage, NY on Saturday, September 3, 2011. Nine New York teams participated in a total of seventeen thirty minute challenge bouts during the double-elimination tournament.

Double elimination meant that one loss would send a team down to the losers bracket, still with a chance to win the rest of their games to still come in on top.  A second loss could mean elimination from the tournament.

The Hellions scored their first win over the Hudson Valley Horrors (Kingston, NY) with a score of 67 - 40. The game started off fast. Like....insanely fast. The first couple jams it seemed that both teams want to use a strategy of racing the pack. This couldn't be maintained by either team, which slowed the pace of the jams down (which also works!)

Photo by Sean Hale/Hale Yeah

Our next match was against Roc City Roller Derby of Rochester, NY. The Hellions took a strong lead in the first 15 minutes, but after calling a team time out, Rochester rallied to shorten the gap to under 10 points. The Hellions held strong in the remaining minutes and held onto the lead with a final score of 74-71.

Taking advantage of a power jam.
Photo by Sean Hale/Hale Yeah.

Two wins secured a spot in the quarter finals, where the Hellions faced Central New York Roller Derby (CNYRD), from Utica, NY...

Stay tuned for Part 2!

Gearing up for Empire Skate Showdown Strikes Back 2011

In less than two weeks we'll be headed to Long Island to participate in the second annual New York State roller derby tournament, hosted by the Long Island Roller Rebels for the 2011 NYS Roller Derby Tournament: Empire Skate Showdown Strikes Back 2011. Empire Skate Showdown  will feature nine New York teams will duel it out over 17 thirty minute challenge bouts. In their first match of the day, the Hellions will take on the Hudson Valley Horrors.

Doors open at 10am at Skate Safe America, 182 Bethpage Sweet Hollow Road, Old Bethpage, NY. Tickets are $20 in advance, $25 at the door.

Here's hoping we place better than we did last year. We've been training, and we're ready to kick some butt!

Here's some posts from last year about the first annual Empire Skate Showdown:

• My thoughts on ESS the night before the tourney.
• My thoughts about feeling not too bad about losing.
• Did you know Deadlie Mercury's first bout ever was actually a tournament?
• Flexi Wheeler tells you alllll about the tournament.

Guest post by Miss Ida: What is AFTDA?

Derby has its fair share of acronyms: HoTRD, CDTA, WFTDA, MRDA, NSO, LJ, JTO, etc

Miss Ida with CDTA skater Up End Atom.
Photo by Pete Rodriguez

It really goes on and on.

Announcing WFTDA Easterns 2010 with Rev Al Mighty of
Providence (Steel City vs. Charm City)

Sometimes it stands for a league's name like "HoT RD" is the Hellions of Troy Roller Derby. Sometimes it's a team like CDTA is the Capital District Trauma Authority (who skates under the league of Capital District Men's Roller Derby - CDMRD). It could also be a governing body like the WFTDA is the Women's Flat track Derby Association and MRDA is the Men's Roller Derby Association. Or it could be a certain type of official like a NSO is a Non Skating Official, those amazing people holding up the white boards and writing down important information on a clipboard. It could even be a specific move or status, LJ is Lead Jammer and JTO is Jammer Take Out, something most blockers strive for!

One acronym you might not be familiar with the AFTDA. Now, it looks pretty close to WFTDA and there is a reason for that. AFTDA stands for the Association of Flat Track Derby Announcers. Sadly not a lot of skaters even know such a thing exists...but we are hoping to change this!

Taken from the AFTDA Website:

If you have ever been to a flat track roller derby bout, watched one on TV or even caught one of the multiple on-line streams then chances are you've heard exceptional play by play, witty banter and a detailed explanation of the rules and strategy employed by the skaters on the track. If this is the case then you've heard an AFTDA Member hard at work. We are the sports broadcasters for the fastest growing sport in the world, Flat Track Roller Derby!

The members of the AFTDA strive to improve their knowledge of an ever changing game, increase their level of professionalism and ensure a good time is had by all. The AFTDA members are lovers of Roller Derby and their enthusiasm shines through in the voices you hear while at most sanctioned roller derby bouts. Certification tests have been developed to ensure that each announcer has a deep understanding of the rules, methods and hand signals employed during a roller derby bout. While they make it seem easy while on the mic, these announcers have dedicated their time and their efforts on bringing the highest level of play by play, sponsor marketing, crowd education and fan enjoyment possible to each and every bout.

Wait. Did that blurb up there say something about a test and rules? Oh yes! AFTDA members are the best of the best! We aren't just on the mic talking about pretty girls skating in circles.

We take this gig seriously.

AFTDA members are expected to know the most up to date WFTDA rule set. All 43 pages, including hand signals. It's a lot to know but if the announcer doesn't know it how are they going to explain it to you?

ECDX 2011 calling with Sashion Victim (Providence Roller
Derby vs. DC Rollergirls)

The certification test is given several times a year and mostly at large venue events, like the Big 5 Tournaments and the East Coast Derby Extravaganza put on bu the Philly Roller Girls every Summer (or as I like to call it: Roller Derby Summer Camp) ECDX is where I passed my certification test with a 98! I was pretty excited to say the least!

The AFTDA also has a Code of Conduct. You might be wondering why announcers would need a Code of Conduct for....Well, say you are a jammer and just reentered the track from the penalty box. Not one blocker has turned around to see you and all of a sudden the announcer calls out "Jammy McJammer is out of the box and about to pass through the pack!" Suddenly everyone turns around and sees her! D'oh! Not ok. This is a serious NO-NO in announcing and, conveniently enough, is addressed in the COC (another acronym). Derby announcing isn't like major league sports. Derby generally takes place in smaller venues and spectators and skaters alike can hear our announcing. The announcer’s job is to explain what just happened, not predict the future.

The AFTDA strives to make sure announcers do not:

• give away jammer position
• coach from the mic
• talk about a strategy that a team is about to try

Good announcing should have nothing but a positive impact on the bout. Educate and entertain, that’s my motto. Bad announcing can get you punched at the after party!

The AFTDA has a Board of Directors (BOD, I told you there are tons of acronyms). the BOD is made up of our Regional Representatives including the Eastern Rep, Boston Derby Dames very own Pelvis Costello.

I have known Pelvis for quite some time now, and I have to say he is one of my AFTDA derby announcing heroes. He is very witty and I dare say the master of pop culture references. He is also very knowledgeable about the sport. He was so very understanding and patient with me as I learned the ropes at my first WFTDA Regionals last year.

Working with one of her annoucer idols, Mr.
Jake Steel of the LIRR at ESS 2010.

Another one of my AFTDA announcing heroes is Long Island's Jake Steel.  He has been with LIRR (Last one, I promise.) since they first started up. I am proud to say the majority of my clever derby lines come from this man. He single handedly wrangles all of the announcing for the Empire Skate Showdown, New York’s roller derby tournament. That’s a lot of work and don't think we don't appreciate you for it Mr. Steel!


I have a very long list of announcing heroes so I won't subject you to all of them. But please keep in mind the next time you are at a bout and there is a good announcer who is speaking clearly, explaining the rules, is witty and doesn’t piss off the skaters. That might not be your average run of the mill announcer calling that play by play. You might be in the presence of an AFTDA certified announcer!

See you track side!

Ida Feltersnatch
Certified AFTDA Announcer
Ida on AFTDA
Ida on Facebook

Our Cup Runneth Over!

Guest post by Flexi Wheeler



On September 4th the Hellions traveled -- en masse in a chartered Yankee Trails bus -- down to Old Bethpage for the first ever, all-New York State, roller derby tournament.  This tournament was organized and hosted by the Long Island Roller Rebels who invited every league in the state, with eight leagues accepting the invitation to play, including:  Albany All Stars, Assault City of Syracuse, Central New York, Gotham Girls of NYC, Hudson Valley Horrors, Ithaca League of Women Rollers and of course ourselves and Long Island.



We went down to the tournament with a roster of 20 players of varying experience, from a single 3 year veteran (uh, that’s me), to two players who had not yet ever bouted!  The bulk of our players were evenly divided between girls who had just finished their second season and girls who had just finished their first season.  Because we knew we were the most junior league entered in the tournament, we expected to be challenged and to learn a lot.  It was anybody’s guess what it would be like when we got down there but our entire league was excited to be a part of this tournament.  Our coaching staff made it very clear that, in true Hellions spirit, we would be playing every member of our roster in at least one bout.  We believe that building a strong league and promoting ideals of fair play will eventually lead to athletic dominance as we support our players at every stage of their development.



When we arrived at the tournament, I was personally overwhelmed by the realization that I knew so many other players.  It was like a big derby reunion for me, and a wonderful networking opportunity for all of our newer girls.  Typically, we play a single team at a time and expect to see other players we’ve met on the track before, but to see everyone all at once was really awesome.  You begin to feel like the roller derby community is huge as you looked around and saw sooooo many familiar faces yet, at the same time, you realize it’s small and intimate because you know all these people by name.  And, the relationships!  Positively incestuous!!!  Players that used to be on one team but now on another.  Players that are also refs (refs that are also players?).  Leagues that arose as offshoots of other leagues.  The same themes play out over and over all over the derby world, and a tournament of this size – biggish yet smallish – brings that realization in to focus.  I’ve had the good fortune to have played alongside, or against, many of the players on each of the leagues who were there.



I don’t know if anyone reading this wants the detailed blow-by-blow of all the scores for the myriad of bouts played over the course of that very long Saturday but I’ll assume you’re interested in how the Hellions did.  Fair assumption if you are reading this!  

Photo by Sean Patrick Hale

Our first bout of the tournament was against Central New York.  We had played CNY out in Rome, NY at the beginning of our 2010 season so it was a real pleasure meeting up with them again.  The Clubbers, as they are known, came out victorious, beating us 63-43 in the half-hour bout.  The Clubbers were in especially great spirits, having just received word in the prior week that they had been admitted to the Women’s Flat Track Derby Association (roller derby’s national governing body) as a full member league, having fulfilled the terms of the apprentice program.  There was a lot of congratulating going on as this is a big achievement.

In our second bout we faced off against our good friends, The Hudson Valley Horrors.  Seeing some of those familiar faces reminded me of a brutally hot summer day back in 2007 when I played in my first ever exhibition bout and where members of the Horrors were there to help out.  I realized I’ve known some of these ladies for 3 years now.  We have recently begun working more closely with the Horrors, scheduling regular scrimmages between our two teams and it’s an arrangement we’re all stoked about.  The Horrors emerged the winners with a final score of 83-43.


Our final bout was against the Assault City girls.  Those of us who know them haven’t seen them in quite some time because we have not played them since our last season (2009) at Frear Park in Troy.  I will always fondly recall my first opportunity to play Assault City, back in the spring of 2008, as the bout where I first found my hitting mojo.  This was our closest bout yet we still suffered a last defeat, losing 62-52. 

At the end of the day, the tournament awarded MVPs to each team and consoled the 8^th place team (uh, that’d be us!) with a bandaged bruised apple trophy.  We all got to play some derby, mingle with our derby comrades, and watch some amazing derby too; for excitement, you just couldn’t beat the final championship game between the All Stars and Gotham’s Wall Street Traitors.  Gotham’s derby dominance is legendary, having been in existence for 7 years and national champions several times.  With only an 8 player roster, Albany gave the Traitors an incredible run for their money, eventually taking second place overall.  It was a helluva way to spend a Saturday and Long Island deserves generous accolades for such a successful event.



It’s not always the big victories but sometimes a series of little victories along the way that keep you on track to your goals.  We held our own against more established leagues, we played all of our players, we never lost by more than 40 points and nor did anyone hold us to under 40 points.  And we had FUN.  And we saw our friends.  If that glass ain’t at least half full, I don’t know what is!  Our foremost league goal is to have the Hellions gain entrance in to the WFTDA apprentice program so that we can continue to grow our league, promote the sport of roller derby and eventually find ourselves playing the sport we love at the regional and national levels. Hey, anything is possible when you put your mind to it and you have the collective force of 60 dedicated individuals---HELL YEAH, HELLIONS!!!

ESS Eve

Well, it's the night before Empire Skate Showdown.  We had a really great practice last night and I am so pumped to head to Long Island tomorrow and have a great time.  From what I understand, every team is guaranteed to play at least three 30 minute bouts.  Hmm, only 30 minutes.  I think this could be good and bad.  It's going to be a long day, so 30 minutes games (instead of games with two 30 minute periods) will definitely allow us to play all day without tiring out too bad by the last game.  However, sometimes I think teams need the first period just to warm up and get used to the strategy of the team they're playing.  Then, in the second period, that's when things really come out in the wash.  But sometimes things are tied neck and neck through both periods.  Hopefully after our first game, we'll be warmed up, ready to play, and ready to kick some butt.

One other thing that I just can't get over... this tournament must be so much work for the Long Island Roller Rebels (LIRR) to put together.  I can't imagine the magnitude of organization.  Roller derby is so home grown, too, so that makes it even more impressive in my eyes.  The skaters build everything from the ground up (with the help of volunteers, of course!) and then skate their hearts out playing the game they love.  I am very proud to be part of this tournament.

Empire Skate Showdown

Next weekend we're headed to Long Island to skate in the first ever New York State roller derby tournament... the Empire Skate Showdown!!  It's an all day event hosted by the Long Island Roller Rebels.  Eight leagues from NY will be there.  This is the first tournament I have ever skated in, but not the first tournament I've attended (Nationals, East Coast Extravaganza).

One thing I'm excited about is the bus ride down to the Island with the league.  Besides the fact that it's going to be super early in the morning, I'm sure there will be shenanigans.

I'm also excited about the tournament because a few of my college friends who live in the City are going to come and check it out.  And afterward, I'll be spending the weekend in the City with them and Mr. T.  Only my friend Liz has seen me play so far.

I think the best thing, however, will be meeting new derby girls from near and far across the State.  It's like we're all in one big club and this is a great chance to meet other people with the same interest.

We've got two more practices 'til the big day.  Time to get rolling!

Men's Derby

This weekend I had the pleasure of attending three roller derby bouts. On Saturday I traveled to Old Bethpage, Long Island to see a double header: the Long Island Roller Rebels (LIRR) vs. Pioneer Valley's Western Mass Destruction, which followed a game of men's derby featuring the New York Shock Exchange (NYSE) based out of NYC vs. Pioneer's Valley's The Dirty Dozen, based out of Northampton, MA This was my first time seeing men's derby. Today I will be blogging about that, and later this week I'll write about LIRR v. PVRD and the amazing bout I saw on Sunday. 


I am not sure how many men's teams there are in the United Sates, but the eastern US is lucky to have a solid and growing base of men's derby. In fact, the NYSE and the Dirty Dozen are among the top men's teams in the country. Other local teams of note are the Connecticut Death Quads and the up-and-coming Albany Men's Roller Derby team! 


But for now, my initial impressions: When I first pondered the idea of men's derby, I imagined (with great gender bias, obviously) football on rollerskates. I thought the men would be knocking each other out left and right with little regard for safety (their own or others!) I probably could not have been more wrong. Men's derby leagues, at least the ones I am aware of, play by the same set of rules as women's teams (generally WFTDA 4.0). Instead of going (pardon the phrase) balls out, they played a very strategical game. In comparison to women's derby I have seen, I observed that the men played in somewhat of a tighter formation, and in order for their jammer to get through the pack of blockers, they really had to bounce their way through every time; it was somewhat like watching a pinball machine. I just remembered that alloveralbany had a post about men's derby recently. The article quotes a skater, Museknückle, saying, 

"if women's roller derby is like NASCAR, then men's derby is more like demolition derby". 

I would interpret this to mean that women's roller derby is fast-paced, has a sizable fan base, and the skaters have the endurance it takes to skate through an entire game and come out victoriously. Men's derby :: demolition derby could mean that they might look like a motley crew, but underneath their rusty outer shell is some fine engine work that can power through the nastiest machines on the track. Anyone else want to weigh in on that? (If you disagree, remember, I've only seen one game, but I can't wait to see more!)


By the way, Albany Men's Roller Derby has a recruiting event coming up. Join them at Rollarama in Schenectady at 4:30pm on May 2nd. Check them out on facebook for more information. I promise I will write more about men's derby after I am able to do some more research on it (including my thoughts in response to this comment).